Okay, give me your best jokes! Let's go.

Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank?
Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.

Two amphibians were croaking at each other outside my window. It was Toadally ribbeting!

Why does a seagull fly over the sea?

Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side got amputated? He’s all right now.

What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick

What do you call an ant who fights crime? 
A vigilante!

Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

He pasta-way.

Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed.

What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!

What's one way we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves. 

Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

What is a cat's favorite desert?

Micecream!

 Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other?
Dill with it.

"What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?" "They're both Paris sites."

Did you hear the joke about the yoga instructor?

Yah... it's a bit of a stretch. 

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?

Sofishticated.

How do you stop an astronaut’s baby from crying?
You rocket!

What did the father buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school?

Bi-son!

How do you turn a banana into a vegetable?

Step on it - you'll have squash!

I was going to tell you a joke about boxing but I forgot the punch line.